There are no pieces to pick up –

they are scattered, lost. I don’t

want to waste more time in

mourning them. I’m not sure

if I were able to go back and find the

old me, what I would choose to

bring here, how much youth I would want.

It’s a shock to see how much time

has gone by, how I’ve aged.

I feel as though I’m coming from the

dark and everything looks too

bright. I want to step back inside

and close the door. My eyes hurt. I

don’t know where to look. I don’t

know anybody anymore. Where

did they go? Where did everything I

used to know go? This new me

is like a baby and needs gentled along

but no one sees that. Part of me says

run out and dive in! you won’t drown.

Part of me mourns that my

bathing suit no longer fits.

Part of me looks down in dismay at

my shoelaces, which are untied.

by Cher Bibler